Writers note:This is my open letter from the student body to Josh "The Duke" Ducoulombier asking him to join the basketball team. Because we need skills. And height. It will be one of many. The Barons are Back!
Duke,
Join the team. You'd kick ass.
Love,
The student body
PS- Five Reasons why you should join:
1. You have mad skills. You scored like 2,000 more points than anyone in intramurals last year. 2,0000! You're the King of Franciscan Intramurals. True royalty Duke. How can beating up on overweight, untalented PRODS and Staff Members fulfill your inner competitive drive? Come on now....
2.We need height. You're over 6'5. And you can shoot the sweet turn around jump shot. Or dunk. Or play the low post. And have you seen this team rebound? Neither have I... We need that height.
3. We personally guarantee the student body would honor you will the official title of the Duke of Franciscan. We would petition for "Duke Day", where the Administration would show its love by giving you the day off of classes, and we would hold a feast in your honor. We would drink Dukeraide: The special drink that makes you so awesome (which of course is the blood of all the opponents you destroyed. Including all of AMDG. And Tim Tebow. You know he looks up to you don't you? He even wears "the Duke of Franciscan" PJ's to bed. So do I. But that's our little secret...)
4. You could be the Catholic Kobe Bryant. Minus the whole Colorado thing. And getting rid of Shaq.
5. You're a baller, the best we got. Being an RA is just an excuse. Get out on the floor son! Represent our University. This team already has a ton of talent. But you can turn this team into a real competitor. You're the missing piece. The perfect mix of talent and experience to lead this team. We're like the Bulls after MJ went to play baseball, we are missing that one super duper star. And you could be it. Do this as a service to our University.
Could you imagine the people that would show up to the games, the energy it would bring to have you on a team with so many talented guards? People would go crazy. It would be like the Run T-M-C days from the late '80s at Golden State. They'd pack the Fieldhouse. It would be loud and fun and competitive. No we wouldn't win every game, maybe not even go .500, but at least you give us a chance. So get off the proverbial baseball field, pack up your hypothetical glove and bat, and as MJ so eloquently put it when he returned, please say: "I'm Back".
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2 comments:
Listen fellas this "duke" guy u r talking about is obviously not going to join the team.....u know it, personally i've already tried to get him out there to play, but he says "not until next year when he isnt an RA, so let it go, u got the team as it is, this team has trouble winning....obviously, but what do u suggest they should do when all they have is matt liedel getting rebound put-backs and screen and roll 3-pointers, when he should be having screens ran for him all day. Yeah theres other great shooters on the team but lets face it, this team needs some real help learning the fundamentals of the game, i mean do they even know what a box out it, box out and get some rebounds barons defense wins games, but rebounding wins championships. Theres absolutely no height on this team but you know, the only thing to do is BOX OUT! and obviously coach Donny dont go over those kind of fundamentals in practice, so until then those boys will be getting outrebounded time and time again. NE way keep up the blog fellas its good to get a diff. reaction about this team, who knows what might happen, its a long year ahead!
Thanks for the post! Yeah we know Duke doesn't want to join. But come on... how can he pass up Duke Day? But in all seriousness your evaluation of this team hits the mark. If we could only box out. That's the key. Our stupid 2-3 zone kills us. We never box out in it, and that is the reason JCC won last night. Fundamentals, fundamentals, fundamentals. But we're young and learning (I still think that the expierence factor is what is causing us to fold late, the other two creators credit it to coaching, but i degress), so hopefully something will happen. We love this team as is, just think that some hight will help. Thanks for the support. THE BARONS ARE BACK!
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